Passing Notes

Part of this job is taking notes... and trying to figure out which notes to follow, which to discuss, and which to discard. Sometimes discarding the note requires a whole lot of discussion first. I have no idea how much of my life is spent trying to figure out notes - but probably more time than I spend writing the script in the first place. I guarantee there will be many more blog entries about notes.

I have a handful of buddy action scripts that feature a male and female team. After 48 HOURS, there was a flood of action movies featuring culture clashes - running all the way up to RUSH HOUR. I thought that eventually someone would want to explore a different kind of clash - and what is more different than male and female? And, it was a good way to explore my love and confusion for the opposite sex... in scripts where lots of stuff explodes real good.

But I never expected that in this day and age producers still would have trouble with a story where women have guns. Producers keep telling me to change the woman into a character some rapper could play - and not Lil Kim (even though she has firearms experience) - a *male* rap star. If it were only that easy. Imagine trying to change ADAM'S RIB into a story about two male lawyers - just can’t work.

So, when a producer became interested in one of my male-female buddy action scripts and *didn’t* want me to change the woman into a man, I thought this was a good sign. One of these scripts might finally make it to screen.

Now, no money had changed hands, yet. So it’s the beginning of the producer-writer relationship - you want them to like you so that they will pop the question: can I give you a big fat check for your screenplay? You don’t want to say the wrong thing.

The notes at this stage usually aren’t for a rewrite - they are just feedback on the project. Kind of a getting to know you stage. You are learning what they intend to do with your script once they buy it. But one of the things that often happen at this stage is a request for an unpaid rewrite. Here’s how that works - the producer says they have a great connection with a studio, and want to set up your script there. But, you see, there’s one or two little things that need to be done to make the script "studio quality" before they take your script in. You see, they only have one shot at this, and they want it to be the best shot - your best shot, too. So, if you could just do these couple of minor changes, the script will probably end up at the studio. Sometimes they pull out the "reputation" argument - they have a reputation as a producer, and they just can’t give the script to the studio like this. They don’t want the door to close on *them*.

The reputation thing frequently steams me - because often the studio they are taking this script to has already shown interest in other scripts of mine (through other production companies actually on their lot) and this producer would be *lucky* to ride my script through the studio gates. I’m the one who should get to play the reputation argument...

But that’s not the way to get them to pop the question and give you that big fat check.

So I play nice, and smile and try to explain why I think the changes they request will turn something that already is "studio quality" into the sort of cheese they’ve been making. Many notes are designed to file down any sharp edges in the script and make it... bland.

On this script, the producer doesn’t play the reputation card, but they do want me to do a rewrite before he takes it in. If the notes are reasonable, I may do that. I figure this guy already likes the script the way it is - he doesn’t want me to change the female cop into a male rapper cop - maybe the notes will be minor changes that actually improve the script?

And the first note is just a dialogue change. There’s a scene where my female cop first meets the male cop and she has a witty remark. Could that remark go to the male cop? Well, maybe not the same remark- but some witty remark. Lose her line and give him one? Sure, I think I can do that.

The second note is also a dialogue change... in fact, it’s another witty remark by the female cop. The male cop already has a witty remark - but can I lose hers?

The third note... the fourth note... the fifth note...

All of the notes are about giving the male cop all of the witty lines. Now, this is *banter* where the two trade insults - and by removing her lines, all we have left is the male cop insulting the female cop for the entire script.

The first note I get that isn’t about dialogue is about a scene where the female cop saves the male cop’s life in a scene - which is a set up for a later scene where he saves her. And throughout the script part of their relationship is based on her saving his life - so he owes her. Guess what the producer wants to do? Can we switch the script so that the male cop saves her in the earlier scene... then also saves her in the later scene?

So, I start out discussing these notes. The problem with the dialogue notes is that if it’s all him insulting her - it stops being funny. Part of these exchanges are the back-and-forth nature... they build to (hopefully) bigger and bigger laughs. Without the back-and-forth there is no build and the it won’t be as funny.

The producer disagrees - it’s just better without her responses. It just is.

So I discuss the relationship between the two - and how that will suffer if everything is one sided.

The producer disagrees again.

Anyway - no matter how I try to explain why it’s better if you have two evenly matched people playing the game, he’s not having any of it.

Now, here’s where this guy went wrong: he didn’t bring in the audience. It was all "because he knows what works". If he had explained to me that the audience for films like this are 15-25 year old males who are already insecure around women and by having a woman be an equal or even *potentially* dominant character would scare them away - and the movie would flop, I would have understood that. I’m not sure I would have made the changes - but I would have really given it some thought.

As it was, these notes were discarded. The producer obviously had problems with women and wanted me to change the script to make him happy. Just as I am going to consider notes that may change the script from what *I* want in order to make it a better script, I am also going to discard any note that will change the script just to make it what one person wants - be that a star or director or producer. Notes are to improve the script or make it more "filmable" - sometimes changes need to be made for location or cast or other practical elements in order to physically make the film. I’m more than willing to make those changes, even if they end up with some silly stuff like changing the fear of spending time in a Mexican prison onto the fear of spending time in a Canadian prison (HARD EVIDENCE). Some things just have to be done in order to get the film made.

In this case, I told the producer I disagreed - I thought the notes would ruin the script.

And that pulled the plug on the deal.

And maybe closed the door at this production company, because instead of being a discussion of what might work or not work in a movie - it was all about what he thought worked (no reason). His instincts. His experiences in the trenches as a producer.

Now, I also have instincts. I also have experience in the trenches.

As a writer, I often know what works and what doesn’t just by instinct. That might be good enough when I’m writing the script, but it’s not god enough when I’m discussing the notes with a producer. There I need *evidence*. You can’t discuss feelings and instincts and opinions. We all have those. The only thing we can discuss as facts. That means we need to be able to figure out why one thing works and another doesn’t so that we can discuss the notes. We need to be able to cite evidence when we discuss notes, so that it’s not "he said, she said" but creative decisions based on a logical reason. And this goes for both sides of the table - producers and development executives need to be able to explain the reasons behind their notes.

So, that one isn’t going to get made. On to the next chance for glory....

- Bill

Never Ending To Do List

I can never get through my to do list... it just keeps growing and growing.

I actually have a To Do List. So many things are going on at the same time that I will lose track and forget something important if I don’t write it down. I wish I could say that I used to remember everything - but my memory was never that good. Okay, it’s good when it comes to completely unimportant trivia, but not good for anything that really matters - like RSVPing or sending in articles to Script or that meeting I had where they wanted me to send them a one pager on some script of mine. I just forget anything important unless it’s written down.

So, I return from Hong Kong and all of the things I would have done over the two weeks hasn’t been done (who would do it?) And there are even some odd additions. While I was gone, some folks ordered some stuff - Blue Books - and I don’t yet have a permanent printing company yet and am close to out of stock on everything... and that means dropping off originals at the printers and waiting for them to get around to it....

Except it wasn’t that easy.

RETURN FROM HONG KONG

So, I get back from a long flight with no sleep and I’m not feeling well. Probably the no sleep and two breakfasts on the planes - I’m not used to eating that many rubbery omelets. I decide to take a nap - because that’s what you do when it’s the middle of the afternoon and you haven’t slept in over 24 hours. You don’t *sleep* - it’s the middle of the day. Sunlight is blasting through the bedroom window. So you nap. Sort of drifting for a couple hours at a time. Somewhere around 9pm I decide to grab a meal and maybe watch a DVD... except I still don’t feel good. I force myself to eat a salad to make up for all of that crappy plane food, and pop in one of my HK DVDs - praying that it will play in my USA DVD player. While in HK I bought a couple of DVDs that weren’t available in the USA, but I was afraid - regions and all - that they might just end up souvenirs. "Yeah, I bought that Johnny To DVD in Hong Kong, can’t play it, but the box art is cool, isn’t it?" Anyway - DVD plays perfectly. Next time I’m in HK I’ll but a couple dozen.

The next morning I wake up feeling ever worse.... then I puke. And puke some more. And puke until part of the heels of my feet get stuck in my throat.

For the next few days I’m sick *and* jet lagged. At first I thought it was food poisoning - but after a couple of days I figured it was a virus. Probably something from being stuck in a plane with a bunch of coughing sneezing people for over a dozen hours. My mom always gives me that Airborn stuff, but I never remember to take it. I must have a dozen unopened boxes in the medicine cabinet.

Nothing at all gets crossed off from the To Do List. And the list actually grows - though nothing gets added while I’m puking. I write the additions when I’m back to normal.

Much of the stuff on the list has to do with my May class in LA - I need to buy ads and "Johnny Appleseed" brochures to places where screenwriters might be found. But while I was in HK I got a mound of e-mails on all sorts of things - from producers interested in screenplays (one contract, two requests for hard copies, one request for a PDF... done from a Starbucks in HK) to a producer who has a tenuous connection to a major studio who wants me to come up with a stack of pitches for DVD sequels to movies from their theatrical library, to rewriting the last two scenes of a page one rewrite on a script that a manager wants to read. Plus there’s the usual article for Script Magazine, the usual tip rewrites and new tips, and rewriting my book and editing 8 CDs worth of classes. Not to mention that script a friend of mine gave me to read over the holidays - I read it and wrote notes in longhand, but you can’t e-mail longhand. Problem is - every time I start to type them up I realize I have no idea what this note means - and I’ll have to re-read the danged script. Many of the things on my to-do list fall into this odd category - stuff that go put off so long I now have to start from scratch. I have a stack of half-written script tips that require me to re-see some awful film in order to complete. I actually have to watch BLACK DAHLIA again for one - don’t hold your breath on that one.

Now, my ability to prioritize sucks. Part of that is not knowing what odd longshot might actually pay off. My career (whatever that is) has been one long shot after another. I never know what is a complete waste of time and what will lead to my next sale.

MY LAPTOP DIES

So, once I’m back on my feet and ready to write I decide to finish the page one rewrite - I’m only two scenes away, right? And that’s the day my laptop becomes a paperweight.

A side effect of that is that the HK blog entries that I’ve written... are trapped on that machine. Eventually I will either get the paperweight turned back into a computer or rewrite those three entries.

But the larger issues are of momentum. Even after I buy this shiny new laptop, I’m bummed out and feel more like goofing off on message boards than anything productive. I rewrite some tips - that is the never-ending job that must be done every single day whether I feel like it or not.

There’s a thread on my message boards called Writers And Depression. I added an upbeat post or two... but when everything seems to just go wrong at the same time, it’s difficult not to wonder why God hates me. Friends of mine have commented that I have the worst luck of anyone they know - bad things happen to me. From out of the blue. I try to just smile through it - and so far I’ve survived. Anyway - I was not feeling like being productive for a while... and part of that might have been residual jet-lag-and-flu.

When I finally felt like working again - and had the new laptop loaded up with all of my programs and projects - I sat down and cranked out the beginning of one of those 2 scenes, then got a phone call from a producer. He’d looked over my list of loglines and really liked this one at the bottom... A script from 1989. I didn’t tell him it was from 1989, and I didn’t tell him that it was written on some ancient computer that I no longer owned - so all I had was a hard copy. And I didn’t tell him that hard copy sucked - you know, it’s like 20 years old! I’ve actually learned something in the past 20 years. So I tell him I’ll get the script to him in a couple of days... and shift gears. I had scanned in the script a year ago and actually done some of the rewrite already - so it wouldn’t take me too long to finish it...

Except it’s on the paperweight.

I have to rescan it. I have to correct all of the weird things that happen when you scan a script (suddenly, there are characters named IN THE CLOSET - now, that’s kind of on the nose as a character’s name, and what’s more, his dialogue seems to be a description of what happens in the closet in one scene). Once I’ve done all that - I still have to do the rewrite I was going to do before. Part of the rewrite is a change in location - the logline the producer read takes place in a completely different location than the 20 year old version of the script. The rewrite on the paperweight actually addressed this - but it’s on the paperweight. So I’ve been focused on that rewrite... and nothing else on the To Do List has been To Done.

And the most I’ve done on the DVD sequel project is to make a list of "sequel possible" movies in this particular studio’s library. It’s a good list. I’m afraid if I wait too long one of the 53 other screenwriters this producer called will come up with a bunch of lame ideas... and those are the ones they will go with.

I’m getting close to getting all of the day-today stuff back on schedule (they’re printing blue books, now all I have to do is fold and staple and mail them) and I’m half done with the Script Magazine article that was due a couple of days ago. I still have new script tips to write up, but I think I’ll find the time to squeeze that in.

But the worst part about my To Do List? Well, I met 3 producers in HK (from here) who want to read scripts... and I haven’t gotten back to them. I don’t want them to forget me!

Hmm, I can cross off "New Blog Entry"! The list is one item shorter now!

So now I’m doing well, but busy as hell.

- Bill

Update

All is well...
I'm busy as hell.

- Bill

We Interrupt This Story....

Yesterday my laptop crashed.

It's 3 years old, and has been acting up a little - trouble booting up, takes a couple of starts before it goes all the way some days.

Before I went to Hong Kong I did a (hopefully) complete back up of files just in case. Yesterday, I get to Starbucks, do some brain work to prepare myself to write the scene... really get into it to the point that ideas are bouncing around my head like popcorn in Jiffy Pop foil. Pull out the laptop and...

It starts up right away. No problems today!

Then... it freezes up about 5 minutes into my work. Maybe 10 minutes. Enough time to really get going.

So, I try a litte of everything, and nothing works. Can't even shut it down. It's frozen. I de-power it, try to start it again... and get a message: it ain't gonna start again. I can't even start it up in Safe Mode. Won't work.

Now, I could take it to a repair place and wait... but I have scenes to write and a tip to put up. Plus, last time I took this very laptop in for a repair, they wiped the hard drive - and I lost everyrthing. This was to repair a broken plastic hinge. Oh, and I didn't have the laptop for about 6 months because the repair place also lost it. That was a nightmare.

Now, here's the thing: Sunday I was actually going to by a new laptop... but they were all out of the HP I was looking at. Everyone was. I spent the whole ay looking for a laptop and came home with nothing. Not a big deal, because there was no rush to buy one - I could wait until they had the one I wanted in stock (Maybe Thursday according to the guy at Best Buy).

Now I couldn't wait that long. I needed one *today*.

So I closed up the dead laptop and zoomed all over town until I found, not what I was looking for... but the closest thing to it. You know, probably just like you - my computer is my whole life. Everything important I have is on it. I spend more time with my computer than I spend with my friends and family. I can't live without it.

Now, I have a desk top that still runs Win98 and I hardly ever use. It's, like, 2 gigs total. Bought ot when that was an amazing amount of space. Since then, I've just been buying new laptops and hardly ever working on the desktop. The final death knell for the desktop was when I pulled the plug on Compuserve and now have no dial up or DSL... I'm all wifi, baby! The desktop has all kinds of expensive to replace programs that may not make it to XP... so they just sit on that machine. I *could* have used the desktop to work on the script - but who wants to be trapped at home on warm, beautiful LA days?

Anyway, the new laptop has Vista, and when I slap in my MMScreenplay disk and load it... it doesn't run. I get a message on the new computer that the progam needs to be "elevated". So, I hold up the laptop a bit above table level and try again... still doesn't work. How elevated does this need to be? Should I get in an elevator? So I ended last night by putting up a scipt tip... but afraid that I wouldn't be able to work on my script even after spending a thousand or so on a new laptop. Swell!

Okay - this morning I go to the MMS website where they have a link to "what to do if you have Vista"... and the danged thing works perfect now. Relieved - I can sleep... didn't do enough of that last night. But it's 9am, so instead I'm going to get some work done.

I can't wait to see what other programs don't work on Vista... haven't tried to install my printer drivers, yet.

- Bill